Friday, June 8, 2012

Intuition as the Patient


Here is my white coat and stethoscope in the call room.


Sometimes Spirit gives us a warning before we get sick. I had two. The first was an ominous, 'If you don't slow down something is going to happen to your health' during a channelling session, approximately one year ago. I had been post-call, taught a Reiki Master class, and gone to a Medium session that night. I have a guide, a Medicine one. He had been a healer in another life, and was coming through during the meeting. I love speaking with the Other Side, and can do so on my own, but I enjoy the chance to work with like-minded others. The warning wasn't very clear, so I decided to be a mother, and stop the psychic development certification activities. My son needed me at home at night when I wasn't in the hospital. I thought that would do it.

Have you ever gotten messages from Spirit like that? They are hard to understand. And I work with Spirit and I meditate daily. So don't get upset if you don't get that right when it happens to you. It is all about the dimensions. Translating down to 3D from beyond isn't always a simple fact.

The next warning was from my sister during her Reiki 1 class I was giving early April.  She was new to Reiki, and she scanned my body with her newly-attuned hands. She felt cold in my left lower quadrant of my abdomen. That is the opposite site of the appendix, which is the right lower quadrant. My c-section scar had been hurting me for years, it felt stuck but I never gave it much thought.

It wasn't until my annual exam that my doctor was concerned. This was end of April. He asked me about symptoms. It was strange, sometimes when I say things, I hear my spirit talking through me. "I am easy to take care of" I had said when I first came in. And through intuition my doctor and I both knew it wasn't true. As the exam went on, I saw there was concern. Something inside had changed, grown. He wanted an ultrasound. And I saw it on the exam, since I can read echo from my heart work, as big as a uterus, lumpy, and ugly. 

I did a lot of reflection. For my own reasons, I understood why I had to go through this operation to get it right. When I was younger, I had a similar surgery, only on a different part of the body. It was my calling card to being a doctor. Deep in my heart, I knew this was my chance to do over, the last one. It also was a valuable application of my work as Reiki Doc. And much data did I get from this experience.

I have to be honest with you. A lot of my uterine fibroid was my being upset at only having one child. I wanted FIVE growing up. Like, my own basketball team! I adore children, and pets, and nurturing. Although there was an option for a hysterectomy,  I would not get rid of my uterus because I didn't want to give up hope that perhaps some other time, or place, I could get to be the mother that I am in my heart. Sometimes in my training, I have been torn: wanting to ditch the 4.0 GPA talent, move to a farm, and nurture lots of kids and ranch animals and LIFE. I knew I had a job to do. A spirit job. And I have spent my nose in a book for many, way too many years, getting to the place where I am today, to make a difference in the lives and how we do medicine.

So here were go--intuition ON! I am not holding back : )))

1) my first experience was non-verbal. It was from my surgeon. We have always eaten lunch together for years in the doctor's lounge. He knew my results. I did too. And he asked how I was. Fine. He came by later, and sat at my patio table. He set me at ease by talking about normal things. His intuition knew that I would suffer on my own in silence and not seek help. That is my way. He gently asked, 'how are you feeling?' And that let me know he knew the pain I had inside from my fibroid. My intuition told me, he really wants me to get better! That is how the true healing began.

2) something was amiss in the doctors' office, but I could not put my finger on it. Energetic mayhem. There docs are three sharing an office now. It wasn't right. It was chaotic since the last one joined up. (I since learned from some gossip from another gyno about a betrayal of her by one of the new members of the group. It explained everything I felt. But it didn't affect my doc who worked on me. But the energetic patterns were all in the place, and I picked them up.)

3) the clerks have NO CLUE how serious their job is, and how it leads to surgery for patients like myself. They are almost completely non-medical. the girls at the front have a huge opportunity to bring reiki into the patient experience and create a healthy healing environment.

4) The pre-op nurses tell the patients different things to prepare them for surgery. No jewelry! (I could tell they envied my hawaiian gold) Take a shower but don't shave your legs the night before surgery. Take two showers, one the night before, one the morning of! Don't eat anything after midnight. A little water is okay, though. You know the drill! They said to me. Actually, no, I didn't.

5) The pre-op clinic was a surprise. The paper that I read on every one of my patients, the one that guides me most through their anesthesia plan, is filled out at a counter at the laboratory. There is no pre-op clinic. I went to a fancy one at UCSF so many years ago. That has gone the way of the beta video tape and the eight-track tape. It is a shame that anesthesia does not have so much a presence any more.
these are money-saving perioperative guidelines being implemented. there are less pre-op labs, too.

6) FIVE THIRTY A.M.! You want me to check IN to the hospital at FIVE THIRTY A.M. for a seven-thirty case??? In a different building of the hospital from where surgery is? What a hassle! I made a mental note to my patients to be kinder to them when I start our day with their surgery...

7) Overhearing woman who checked in before me talk at that desk and also in pre-op holding to her nurse: that woman is really getting off on being a patient. she is going on and on about her pain. secondary gain? or what???

8) FAMILY: people who are there for you when you need a little extra love-help-attention yourself. My Crazy Uncle Dave and Cousin Stuntwoman were there for me. At five-thirty in the morning! She'd had a similar surgery herself at my age, and been back to stunts one-week post op. She gave me a stuntman's association visor and it meant the world to me that they could be there (Mom was with my boy, I worried so about him, and wanted him to have her care while I was away).

9) COWORKERS: people saw me on the schedule. Many chose to give me my space, respectfully. Many came and shared they prayed for me, and knew I would do well. They understood the seriousness of emotional impact of needing to have surgery as an operating room worker. This was healing on a very deep level.

10) PREOP: my colleague found me a pre-op nurse who lives in the area who needed to be there at five. She picked me up at four-thirty. Right at my door. And got me ready for surgery in Pre-Op Holding too. The continuity was beautiful. And the spot she picked for my i.v., right under the crease in my right elbow (I am left handed) made for a wonderful stay in the hospital. It was out of the way, and ran beautifully.


more on this tomorrow. xoxoxo

Namaste,

Reiki Doc